Meanwhile, back at the ranch...

• Who's Calgon?
• Do we really have a roof robot?
• I'm going to tell you a secret...Mom would like a ...(goes into another room, and comes back in) a Sealpoint Siamese cat for your anniversary.
• I got a fart monkey in my bottom
• Sitting in time out is for babies, and if you're bad you have to sit in time out, and if you're bad again you get a spanking (as sung by an out-of-tune 3 year old and played on a Casio keyboard)
• Thomas, this is our baby sitter, she's here because mom and dad are going out to eat food without us...it's called a date...one day you might go out on a date with a girl...If you stop pooping in your pants!
• I can't believe I got fart box for my birthday...Aunt Chrissy really knows what makes me happy!
• Mom, we were at the pool and Noah did not want to play with me, all he did was stare as some girls whose swimming suits did not fit.